Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
Randomize
