My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
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