I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
Randomize
