why did your cousin post "out tonight" on facebook? doesn't he know it's only 1 in the afternoon?
shhh don't tell him. it's cloudy out and none of his clocks work
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
Can you help me get ready before work? I need a look that says I'm-happy-to-help-but-I'm-hungover-so-leave-your-attitude-at-the-door-because-I'm-not-taking-anyone's-shit-today.
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
Randomize
