im about as happy as oj after his trial
and next time when you feel me up, do it right
I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
You mistakenly try to piss in a cactus bush ONE TIME and are forever dubbed cactus ass
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
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