I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
Brought a cooler and a case to a parade. I'm getting dirty looks since it's 10:30. Telling people it's for the troops.
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
Alive...but barely. Had dinner with my parents tonight which was conveniently located near where i left my car, phone, and self respect
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
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