Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
Randomize
