How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
I am thankful for thumbs.
Because without thumbs, we would be dolphins.
Land dolphins.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
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