also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
Randomize
