porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
I can feel your judgement through the phone
Dick very happy bro
Randomize
