all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
This is the last time I call a hotel to see if you or some random guy paid for the room last night.
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
I need to wash the frat house off of me
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
Dear sober self, your keys are on the table in front of you the only way your typing this is with autocorrect goodnight love you
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Randomize
