Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
When you get to his house tomorrow, follow your instincts. Find the cat first.
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
My dating life has become some fucked up hydra of dicks; you cut one off and two pop up in its place.
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
Just used an eyelash curler to open my beer since I didn't have a bottle opener. Things are starting to look up.
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
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