Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
The kid I'm babysitting just asked if I had a boyfriend. WHY IS A FOUR YEAR OLD MAKING ME FEEL BAD ABOUT MY LIFE
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
Now you have tequila AND fuzzy slippers. Fuck you. I want that to be MY night.
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
Randomize
