Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
On another note, I think my upstair neighbor is having sex. How awkward would it be if I showed up to her door with a bag of Chipotle?
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