Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
Randomize
