i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
I havent jerked off in so long, my dick literally prevented me from rolling over in my sleep this morning. new definition of painful?
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
Randomize