Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
i think my tv is drunk
wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
The creeper at the bar just realized we have the same birthday and bought me four beers already. He walked off so I took his change and dashed, i'm bringing the case over now.
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
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