He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
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