was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
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