Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
Bad news: I found out that girl you want has a boyfriend. Good news: she'll probably cheat on him with you. Better news: after seeing the way she treats him, that's the most interaction you're going to want with her anyway. Trust me.
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
She needs sedatives and a leash
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
Randomize
