the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
so it turns out the huge bruises on my knees are from drunk bmxing and not getting railed from behind on the ground
and ill have you know that I only wiped out twice
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
My autocorrect won't finish pterodactyl for me and I'm feeling personally attacked.
BRIAN AND ANTHONY SPOON FED MY BROTHER MACARONI AND CHEESE WHILE HE WAS FUCKING ZARA. THEY WENT TO HIGHFIVE HIM AND ZARA WAS LIKE "WOO!" AND HIGHFIVED THEM FIRST
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