i have a girlfriend
if you're drunk do you have a girlfriend?
no
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
Your children are clinging to me like my teets are full of bountiful milkiness. They're driving me nuts. I felt my uterus shrivel up.
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
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