he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
