I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
I just did a drunk experiment to find out what it looks like when you turn a burner on the stove on while wearing night-vision goggles. I may be blind in my right eye now.
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
As an added realisation of today. If we used the last time I got laid as a conceiving date I would have a two week old baby. It's been too long...
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
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