one word: firstdatebathroomanal
Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
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