and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
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