Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
stranger just walked up to the fridge at the party, took the hawaiin punch out, drank it straight from the bottle, looked at everyone who stared in awe and said "im fucking thirsty" and put it back.
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
Randomize
