Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
Randomize
