Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
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