Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
We can only continue to use the "oh what's the difference between circumcised and uncircumcised" for a few more months before people will see through our lies
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
Randomize
