whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
Any particular reason you put 2 smashed up limes in my back pocket last night?
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
what's the name of the guy at the bank you blew to get the lower interest rate?
um. wrong number, but good luck with your loan
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
you had acid sex with the barista. why is my bucket list your tuesday?
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
Randomize
