He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
Just so you know the unusual amount of skittles on your floor is entirely your own fault. You bought me 20 bags of them while I was high.
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
