Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
i woke up with a grocery list signed by "the people who ate all your shit while you were passed out"
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
When she e-mailed me back asking for proof, complete with hospital intake records, I just told her it was a home-birth. I'm prepared to take the fail.
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
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