I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
I was relieved after I found the unopened condom in my pocket. Then I found the open one in the other pocket..
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
I knew my sister shouldn't have gone to the bacherlotte party. Two of the other brides maids have black eyes and my fiancé called me and asked if this is the crazy she's marrying
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
Randomize
