I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
How does it feel to date your dad?
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
Randomize
