This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
I just saw a guy getting escorted with handcuffs on, I'm too drunk to be at the airport right now.
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
I was sat at the table waiting with a glass of wine reading my book and the hotel staff gave me a goldfish in a bowl and said 'heres your date for the night' !
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
Randomize
