I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
My housemates are judging me because I'm high at 8am and making Spongebob shaped Mac and Cheese
They know nothing, John Stoned.
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
Randomize