Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
We got so high we made milksteak
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
Randomize
