what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
Randomize
