We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
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