i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
When I told her I was deaf and took my hearing aids out at night to sleep, she said it must be nice not having to hear drunken roommates having awkward sex late at night.
Randomize
