Please, let me fuck your mom
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
Listen, don't freak out when you walk out on me masturbating in front of my roommate. No homo. He just needs to be put to his place.
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
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