I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
The party bus is stocked with 5 hour energies and beer and someone handing out adderall. Best. Wedding. Ever.
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