at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
We tried to make a sex tape, but we were hammered and she forgot to take the cap off the camera. Somebody starts snoring 10 minutes in.
We literally played a game called pass the child which consisted of us shitfaced tossing the 5 year old birthday boy at each other
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
Randomize
