So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
Randomize
