Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
Randomize
