Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
I resisted the temptation to hold the cake in one hand to alternate bites with the ruffles I was eating. I decided that might make me look dysfunctional.
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
Randomize