There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
I found a video of myself completely naked on my phone giving a drunk tutorial on how to shit properly while blindfolded. Did you record it?
So I told him it takes a lot to get me drunk & he said he was the heavyweight champion in college. We high-fived. Obviously I'm the favorite child.
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
Randomize
