I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
He said he wanted to have kids with me so they could grow up to be professional linebackers. Not. A. Complient.
Urine might work for jellyfish stings, but we found out it doesn't work well for nose bleeds...
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
There are parrots here and they're headbanging to the music. There's also a clown and a pit bull that can jump onto tables. Too high for this shit.
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
When I tried to give you a hickey, you karate chopped me in the neck.
I made everything so magnificently awkward in under 15 seconds. I am magic.
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
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