I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
if you think for one second that i'm not using my mittens as hand puppets at the bar tonight then u dont know me at all!
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
organizing the empties. That sober.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
If I didn't have booty calls, my apartment would never get clean
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
Randomize
